Showing Baby Beluga the World

This is the start of this blog, jumping off from our Caring Bridge Page. 

After our appointment last Monday, when we received the update on Baby Girl's diagnosis, we realized things might not turn out the way we wanted. We still hope and pray everyday for a miracle, that she can make it to a point where she could be delivered and be with us here on earth, but we are also slowly trying to take in the fact that that might not happen.

After getting through another few days of shock that things weren't getting better, Mark and I decided if the only time we have with her might be while I am still pregnant with her, we want to make the best of that time and show her how much we love her. Still being on bed rest, (we are still doing anything in our power to give her the best shot we can) makes grandiose gestures or big outings difficult, but we knew one place we wanted to take her; The Olympic Peninsula.

This is where my grandparents grew up, and where we took family vacations when I was growing up. It is beautiful out on the Peninsula, evergreen trees, forests, and (cold) northwest beaches. Throughout our relationship Mark embraced how important it was to me, and it is where he proposed nearly 6 years ago (we got engaged January 10th 2009!). If we were going to start making the best of the time we have with our baby girl, what better place to start?

So yesterday morning we got up, popped in the car and headed out. It's about a two hour trip from our house and so we made it there, grabbed some lunch and then headed to the Dungeness Wildlife Refuge. This is a beautiful area, with a view of the Straight of Juan De Fuca.

First we went to one of the drive up view points, or as my family has always called them, The Cliffs of Insanity! because there is a huge drop off, with the waves below, just like in The Princess Bride (one of my all time favorite movies!).




Picture we took later looking up at the "Cliffs of Insanity" from below



We only had to walk a few steps to get a gorgeous view of the mountains and water.






We set up the tripod and took a few pictures. We wanted to document that she came here with us. It was really cold out but it was really important to me that I look pregnant in the pictures so I shed some layers and left my big puffy jacket behind the camera. With baby girl having such severe IUGR even though I am nearly 26 weeks pregnant, she is only the size of about a 21 weeker










After getting some pictures, we drove a few minutes within the Wildlife Refuge to the entrance to the Dungeness Spit. This is the longest Spit in the US; the Spit itself is 5.5 miles long, and near the end of it is a beautiful lighthouse. More family history here, as my great, great grandparents were the first keepers of the lighthouse here over 150 years ago.

There was absolutely no way we could make the trip to the lighthouse with my limited mobility but we were able to make the short walk, very slowly, from the parking lot to the beach.

When we got to the beach we headed left a bit and found the spot where Mark proposed 6 years ago. We had a beautiful view of the water right in front of us and the snow capped Olympic Mountains behind the water. It was nearly 4pm by the time we got to the beach so we started to see the beginnings of the sunset. It felt so good to be out in the fresh air

We set up the tripod again and took some more pictures. This one below is by far my favorite. Taken at the exact spot where Mark proposed 6 years ago.





It is amazing to think how different we are now than we were 6 years ago at this same place; we had no idea then what life had in store for us. How in these last 6 years since engagement and 4.5 since we got married we would truly live the words "in sickness and in health", "in good times and bad". Since the joyous time 6 years ago when Mark asked me to spend the rest of my life with him, his father was diagnosed and rapidly declined from cancer. We endured the passing and funeral of his father. We held each other in the dismal times of infertility and wondering if we would ever have a family. We rejoiced when we found we were pregnant in May of 2013 and endured what has thus far been the hardest time in our life when we lost our baby Luca from Misscarriage. We continued to gain strength in our relationship as we once again struggled to get pregnant and were over joyed and scared to find we were pregnant again in August of this year. Just when we thought we couldn't endure more, and were hoping it would be our break, we some how found our relationship could be stronger as this pregnancy became high risk. And now as we face the real possibility that our Baby Girl could be born sleeping and we will once again have an angle baby rather than bringing one home, I am so very grateful for Mark walking through this by my side